Potty training is one of those parental rites of passage that parents and children often struggle with, and one that can be especially challenging for children with autism. However, if you do your homework and properly prepare, your child can be potty trained in no time!

Stage 1: Is My Child Ready?

What Age to Potty Train My Child?

Research indicates that the ideal window for potty training falls between 27 and 32 months. Toddlers younger than 27 months may not be developmentally ready, while toddlers older than 32 months are more likely to resist. 

Is My Child Physically Ready for Potty Training?

Before attempting to potty train, make sure your child can do the following: 

• Sit up by him/herself

• Walk

• Stay dry for a couple of hours at a time

• Imitate actions

• Recognize a full bladder

• Point to body parts that you name

• Retrieve objects for you

• Pull loose fitting underpants up and down

• Follow simple instructions, such as "put the doll on the potty"

If your child is unable to complete any of the above mentioned skills, take a step back from potty training and focus on teaching these missing skills first.

Can I Potty Train My Child If They Are sick?

If your child is sick, constipated, or in a generally uncooperative mood, it is recommended that you delay potty training until they are feeling better.

Stage 2: How To Prepare For Potty Training

What Should My Child Wear?

When you’re potty training, make sure your child is dressed in loose, comfortable, easy to remove clothing. They should be able to dress and undress themselves.

What If My Child Is Afraid To Sit On The Potty?

Your child may have had some experience sitting on the potty for fun, but have they spent an extended period of time there? You may need to slowly introduce toilet time by gradually extending the period of time that they are required to sit. And make that time fun; sitting on the toilet should not feel forced or negative.

Should I Get a Child Sized Potty? 

Adult sized toilets are pretty uncomfortable for most children. Does your child look like they’re about to fall in? Are their legs dangling awkwardly? Get them a child sized potty or toilet seat cover and a stool for their feet to give them a little leverage.

Stage 3: How to Plan for Potty Training

Be Consistent

If you want your child to be potty trained quickly, you need to have a plan, and everyone needs to follow that plan. The more consistent your family is, the faster your child will get the hang of going in the toilet.

Ditch the Diapers and Pull-Ups

Completely ditch the diapers and pull ups. While diapers protect your furniture and floors, they also protect your little one from the discomfort of wet clothing. The natural consequence of having an accident is discomfort.

Teach Your Child to Tell You They Have to Go to The Bathroom

This is a big one. You need to teach your child to let you know when they need to use the potty so that they can be successful. I like to do this by teaching kids to say "potty" each time they go try on the potty.

Positive Reinforcement

Does your child have a favorite snack or activity? Keep those items out of reach for a week or two before you start, so they're even more special when you bring them back out again. Make sure you give your child one of those items/activities immediately after they go in the toilet. This will have your child going back for more! But remember, keep that favorite snack or activity off limits outside of potty training time. You don’t want to go handing out gummy bears willy nilly as an afternoon snack. Why bother working so hard on the toilet for gummies when you can get them for free after lunch? 

Practice, Practice, Practice

Practice makes progress! Give your child more opportunities to successfully “go” on the toilet, and the sooner they’ll be toilet trained. Give your little one plenty of liquids throughout the day. BUT, cut back significantly in the afternoon. While you want to give them plenty of opportunities during the day, you don’t want to have them wetting the bed every night.

Stage 4: It's Go Time

Stock Your Bathroom with Fun Activities

You’re going to be spending a lot of time in the bathroom, and your child is likely to quickly get bored of all that sitting. Make sure you have a bunch of games, books, and fun activities available to them during sit time, since you'll want to pair toilet time with positive reinforcement. Hopefully, if you’ve prepared enough to ensure a full bladder, you shouldn’t be there too long.

Keep the Liquids and Salty Snacks Coming

No kid likes to spend a ton of time on the toilet when they don’t have to “go.” Make sure they have a full bladder before sitting to increase the opportunities for success. Offering dry, salty snacks can be helpful in getting your child to drink more.

Stick to the Schedule

Decide how frequently your child is going to sit on the potty. Every 15 minutes? Every 30 minutes? Consider your child's age, liquid intake, and bladder control when deciding. You don't want to start out going too infrequently and risk an accident. Set them up for success by having them try every 15 or 30 minutes, and gradually have them try less frequently (every 45 minutes, 1 hour, etc.) as they become more successful.

Handle Accidents Like a Pro

If your child has an accident, don't make a big deal about it. Use a neutral tone, minimal language (a quick "Oops, you had an accident" should do the trick), and have them clean up their mess (again, a quick "Time to clean up" is enough). You may have to help them clean up a bit, but the goal here is to teach them that the natural consequence of an accident is cleaning it up, not having someone clean it up for you.

Reinforce Success without Delay

They went on the toilet! Deliver that positive reinforcement immediately each time (at least in the beginning). Have their favorite toy/snack/song within arms reach at all times.

Stay Close to the Bathroom

You and your child may need a change of scenery. Make sure that after you have reinforced them for a success, give them a little break, but set them up for success by staying close to the bathroom. After drinking all that liquid, they’re going to have to go again. Plan out what you will do between potty sits. Parent Pro-Tip: Juice tends to go right through kids, which can sometimes backfire if they have to go every 5 minutes. Start off strong with juice, but then use other liquids such as water or milk to avoid accidents.

Clean Pants Checks

This is a great way to reinforce staying dry. Between sits, schedule Clean Pants Checks, and have them check their pants themselves. Cheer for them when they’re dry!

The Elusive Number 2

Typically, it takes a little longer for children to be fully potty trained when it comes to bowel movements. This is of course due to the fact that there are fewer opportunities to practice this. If your child is regular and goes around the same time every day, make sure they are on or near the toilet at that time, and try your best to extend these toilet sits. They’ll get the hang of it with practice.

Keep It Up

Remember, practice makes progress! Provide your child with plenty of opportunities to be successful by keeping the liquids flowing, reinforcing success, and being on top of your game when it comes to the toileting schedule. Remind them to go when you know they’ve been drinking a lot, and make sure to always have them try to use the potty before you leave the house. If they don't go, that's ok, but remember that you may then need to take them once you get to where you're going. And always remember, if you want your child to try to go to the bathroom, don't ask if they have to go. Kids will almost always say no. Tell them it's time to try, and praise them for being a good listener for trying, even if they don’t have to go.

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